We looked through the windows of the Spanish Galleon, and we saw that all the downstairs lights were off and it was lit entirely by candles and the open fire. Obviously they had had a power cut, but I remarked how nice it looked, and wondered aloud why more pubs didn’t do this, and we decided to head in and enjoy the unusual atmosphere. We were told that we could only be served at the upstairs bar (fair enough, the tills are electric) and so, drinks got, we headed back downstairs, where I was told by the manager to “be careful because of Health and Safety reasons”. I asked what he meant, and he explained to me about the danger due to the electricity supply being out, in response to which I asked him how he thought pubs were lit before the spread of electricity and invention of the incandescent lightbulb. He had no response to that, because there isn’t one that wouldn’t have made him look an even sillier than he already did, but it was transparently obvious that he was itching to close the pub as soon as possible.

I really hate that this idiotic “stop everything” response to every minor little setback has become so widespread. The integrity of the load-bearing structure of the building hadn’t been compromised to the verge of collapse by a meteorite impact, there wasn’t an axe-wielding madman running amok, they hadn’t even had a rather mundane gas leak; there was simply a bit less light than usual, a situation to which the human eye is perfectly capable of reacting, as it has adapted to our needs over hundreds of thousands of years of evolution. Long before we learned how to harness the power of electricity less than two hundred years ago, our Palaeolithic ancestors lived in caves lit entirely by naked flames, going on to domesticate animals and launch large scale agriculture; the great civilisations from Egypt, China, Persia, Greece and Rome rose to dominate the Old World, with the Olmecs, Aztecs, Mayans and Inca doing so in the New World, and all of them without the aid of the light switch; great artists such as da Vinci or Michelangelo, composers such as Mozart or Beethoven, poets such as Shakespeare or John Donne, produced visual, auditory and literary masterpieces of a beauty and influence perhaps still unparalleled today; we perfected everything from the manufacture of steel to the Jacquard loom, from the invention of the printing press to John Harrison’s clocks. All of this and so much more was done without the aid of a single kilowatt-hour from a socket in the wall, and despite the undoubted comforts and benefits it brings us now, our presence here today seems to me like pretty compelling proof that we are not actually terminally imperilled by that absence. I may personally fall short of those great achievements of the past, but I’m pretty sure that I can still manage to sit down and drink a fucking pint of beer by candlelight without exposing myself to the risk of grievous injury or death. Nevertheless, with a depressing inevitability, the pub closed shortly afterwards at around 5.30pm, and we had to leave.

Such a decision will have cost the pub a whole Sunday evening’s worth of takings, and similarly ludicrous decisions taken up and down the country in the name of the hard hat and hi-vis vest brigade must collectively cost the economy billions of pounds per year. And why? Because so many grown adults have been brainwashed into being terrified of their own shadow. Sometimes I just want to take all the world’s H&S wombles, line them up against a wall and shoot them for the good of mankind — sadly in this day and age, I wouldn’t be allowed to do so without completing a 286-page risk assessment form, in which I would have to address the dangers associated with discharging firearms loaded with live ammunition in the direction of unarmoured human beings, then get the form signed in dodecuplicate by persons ranging from the Dalai Lama to a hermit who lives in the Outer Hebrides, before passing a Department of Education approved course on the correct way to use a bulldozer for the perfectly filled mass grave. Seriously though, something needs to be done about the crippling effect of all the nonsensical red tape, the shady no-win-no-fee lawyers who perpetuate the problem by bringing frivolous cases, and the defective legal system where either the judges all too often side with the litigants, or defendants are forced to concede simply because it is cheaper for them to pay out a sum rather than pay the costs of a court case. I don’t often find myself agreeing with David Cameron, but people need to start taking back responsibility for their own actions, rather than always trying to blame someone else for every slight misfortune, and the compensation culture we are currently enduring needs to be dismantled for the long term benefit of everyone. And….. rant over!

We moved on and found some food to eat a fantastic chinese, where we had starters, mains and drinks for two, all for the bargain amount of £23. We slowly mooched back up over the common, enjoying the fantastic view of the stars in the clear sky, while trying not to shiver too much in the cold. Monday came and, being a free day for both of us, once again we found ourselves heading up to Blackheath for a long walk, a lovely late lunch in Giraffe (btw, strongly recommending the apple crumble for two as a dessert for anyone who goes) and then a leisurely evening stroll around the wonderful Cator Estate, looking at all the lovely houses we can’t yet afford. A beautiful end to a fantastic weekend, and I’m now looking forward to travelling to Dublin in a couple of days to bowl in the Irish Open.

I’m quite literally having the time of my life at the moment!

Somehow, Saturday’s blog post neglected to mention the awesome bacon sandwiches we decided to have for brunch when we got up, but I feel that they shouldn’t go unrecorded. We made our way down to the Sainsbury’s in Lewisham Shopping Centre, which was as crowded as usual with the seemingly ubiquitous chavs. Negotiating our way around them with a mixture of caution and scorn, we got our hands on the last fresh bloomer, some delicious thick cut bacon and some excellent coffee, then hot-footed it back to Helen’s to fry the bacon, insert it between doorsteps of the bread and enjoy with plenty of nice strong black coffee, while making disparaging comments about the horrible people on Come Dine With Me. Win!

After I’d caught the train home to get some stuff, Saturday’s official Janathon exercise was undertaken, mainly the 6 mile cycle ride back to Hither Green. It didn’t take too long, but it was dark, well past 9pm, very cold, and I did have about five or six layers of clothing for warmth, plus luggage, so it definitely counts. Bridget Jones: The Edge of Reason was the evening’s entertainment; light-hearted and a bit silly, with a happy ending — perfect viewing just before bed!

Stupid o’clock Sunday morning was punctuated by the unwelcome sound of an alarm going off to wake us in time to trek across to Tolworth for some morning bowling practice for Helen. We were a little free and easy with the snooze button, a little late in getting moving, and a little late in getting out of the door, meaning I almost had to jog the ½ mile to the station while carrying 60lbs of bowling balls. Not easy at the best of times, and especially not at 7am on a dark and wintry Sunday morning, fuelled by five hours sleep, one cup of coffee and a couple of pieces of toast, so I’m gonna claim that as exercise too. We got to the platform just in time, and we made it to Clapham Junction, where Helen blagged a free coffee while we waited for the rail replacement bus service; the coach driver responded to every question with a noise that sounded like the bloke in this clip — it made for an amusing journey at 8am on a Sunday morning.

Bowling done, and feeling the lack of sleep, we headed back to drop off the bowling balls before deciding to defer the Waterlink Way run for the third time, due to our tiredness. I must bear the blame for this third postponement, because, well, I was told I had to. Even though we were both equally tired. Anyway, I’m not disappointed, because we decided instead to substitute it for a walk to Greenwich, a lovely 2½ miles across Blackheath Common, with some amazing views across London. Our goal for a late Sunday lunch was a repeat helping of an excellent roast beef dish from one of the stalls on the market, but alas we had taken so long to get out again that they were closed up by the time we got there and we were denied our reward. We consoled ourselves with a pint of Doombar in the Gypsy Moth pub, before moving on for another drink…. (continued in next post)

Basically it came down to a straight choice between having some food and and doing a Janathon run, and, as the title of this post implied, I’m afraid it only took me a few moments to decide to get a saucepan of water on the go to do myself a huge bowl of spaghetti. It was nice though, with a large splodge of tomato sauce (with added courgette and peppers), a healthy topping of mushroom (sautéed in olive oil), an extravagant helping of grated extra mature cheddar cheese and a generous sprinkling of freshly ground black pepper.

Absent any running, my only exercise for the day was a one-and-a-bit mile bike ride to Albany Park station to catch the train (mostly downhill), and perhaps more strenuous, on the way back from Tolworth, walking a few hundred yards carrying 60+lbs of bowling balls. But I’m definitely claiming my cycling/carrying combo as official Janathon exercise. Sadly, today has now become a second consecutive non-running day, but in a few minutes I’ll be leaving to cycle a few miles back to Hither Green, so that will count for today, and after another bout of carrying bowling balls early tomorrow morning I will be back into running tomorrow afternoon. Hopefully Helen and I will run the fabled Waterlink Way, fabled only because this is now the third time of promising from Helen that we will be running it, with the previous two promises not being kept. It had better be worth it, after all the hype and build-up!

Janathon running totals (same as yesterday):

• Time: 3:52:25
• Distance: 28.7 miles
• Average pace: 8:06/mile

Janthon running totals

• Time: 3:52:25
• Distance: 28.7 miles
• Average pace: 8:06/mile

Like most lifestyle habits, there are pros and cons to being a night owl, but the good thing about it today was that I could get up and be heading out the door for my run shortly afterwards, in the early afternoon, without having to face the multiple hazards of darkness and still-sleepy rush-hour drivers. Or the unpleasantness of the cold nip that usually lingers in the air on winter mornings, but which is burned off by the sun as the day progresses. Today it was nice enough that for the first time this year I felt I could run in just a short-sleeved top, instead of wearing a windproof warm layer over the top. Perhaps as a result of my choice of attire, I set out pretty quickly, completing the first 1k in around 3:45, even though that was completely on the flat. The rest of today’s chosen route involved quite a lot of hill work, some of it fairly steep, which slowed me for the rest of it, but all in all it was a very enjoyable run.

January running totals

• Time: 3:44:28
• Distance: 27.5 miles
• Average pace: 8:10/mile

Wikipedia: This, in the English language, is the singular proximal demonstrative. »

I went out and did a single 3½ mile loop of the roads which run around the local park, determined to put in a good time while doing so. My target was to do it in less than 26 minutes, but when I glanced at my watch as I passed the point where I know the first mile to be, I realised I was going pitifully slowly, taking almost 8½ minutes. Even uphill and into the wind that was quite a poor effort, and it only left me a bit less than 18 minutes to finish the remaining 2½ miles; it was going to be quite tough, but I started striding out, passing the second mile at around 15:45. Alas, as hard as I pushed myself, 10 and a bit minutes was not quite enough to complete the remaining mile and a half; I needed about 10½ minutes, and I completed it in 26:17. Oh well, it worked out to about 23:20 for a 5k, admittedly a fair way short of my new target of 22 minutes, but still fairly pleasing. After a couple of leg-creaking days around day 4, having not run for about three weeks at the end of December, I’m definitely starting to feel good about running again, and doing so every day is getting to be fun.

Janathon running totals

• Time: 3:26:38
• Distance: 25.1 miles
• Average pace: 8:14/mile

Yesterday’s run was relatively uneventful, as it was also very short. Having already cycled the best part of 20 miles during the day, going home via Dartford to do something at the bank which I’d been putting off for days, I decided that I’d already had a fair bit of exercise. So, rather than also go for a long run, I decided to have a short sprint and see how quick I could cover a distance of about a mile.

Sadly, the answer was a resoundingly disappointing “PItifully slow indeed!” 1.2 miles in 8:32 meant I wasn’t even inside seven minute mile pace, instead fractionally outside at 7:07/mile. Obviously I won’t be running marathons at that pace, and I had cycled a fair bit too, but to miss seven minutes for a single mile is clearly something I’ll need to work on. At some point in the not too distant future I also want to take a big chunk out of my 5k PB of 23:59. Even though that time was from the only 5k I’ve done, and after a hard push on my bike just to try and make the 9am start on time, nevertheless I think I’d like to try and get it down to below 22 minutes, which will mean three back-to-back seven minute miles.

Janathon running totals

• Time: 3:00:21
• Distance: 21.6 miles
• Average pace: 8:21/mile

Of course, this did make us alter out running plans ever so slightly; so much food meant that a mid-afternoon gallivant along Lewisham’s Waterlink Way with Hels had to be postponed for the second time in a week. We sat around all afternoon digesting our monstrous meal before setting off for a slightly less scenic evening run up and down the well-lit main road. We set out without a specific distance target in mind, merely intending to turn around and head back whenever felt right; that point was reached at a set of traffic lights after about fifteen minutes, and we managed the return journey back in a slightly faster time than we went out. Getting back inside and checking the distance on mapometer lead to sheer incredulity from both of us that, despite running for over 29 minutes, we hadn’t even covered 5k. I decided to check it on Google Earth, but alas, it merely confirmed that we had, in fact, only just managed to cover a shade over 3 miles in all that time. Oh well, I still think the awful running time was a price worth paying for a lovely lunch.

Janathon running totals

• Time: 2:51:50
• Distance: 20.4 miles

Having blogged Friday’s effort when I got home, I proceeded to waste time playing silly games on the computer, wondering whether to cave in and claim my walk as the day’s Janathon effort, in direct opposition to my original intent to run every day and not count any walks as Janathon, no matter how long or energetic. But I finally decided, at about half past ten in the evening, that I’d have to stick with my plan and go out and run. Again I decided to just go out and run locally until I’d had enough, and that point was reached at the 3.6 mile mark, which is still my longest run of the year. The curious highlight of the run, in fact of all runs so far this year, was my timing as I ran past a car which had been stopped by the police, just in time to hear one of the officers inform the driver that he was being arrested on suspicion of drink-driving. Obviously a serious matter, and a warning to anyone tempted to risk it not to do so, but it must have been a bit surreal for the guy not only to be nicked, but to have it happen just as a random bloke in skintight leggings and hi-vis clothing whizzed past at just gone pub-chucking-out time.

Wish I’d managed to get to run and get to bed earlier though, because I had to then wash all my gear and hang it to dry to have it ready for when I left at half past seven Sunday  morning and bring it to Helen’s for today’s run, which promises to be a magical mystery tour of Blackheath, and will be happening shortly, once our huge Sunday roast carvery lunch has settled comfortably. Somewhat predictably though, I ended up oversleeping as a consequence of too many late nights and was half hour late this morning. Some things never change.

Janathon running totals

• Time: 2:22:36
• Distance: 17.3

Woke up Friday feeling a bit down, and a part of that was due to me still thinking quite a bit about how that game ended, and what might have been; I’ve never bowled a 300 game, my best effort is 299, and I really, really, REALLY want a perfect game. Preferably before Helen gets one

Wrist was still a bit sore, but I was down to sub for someone else’s team on Friday night, so I had to get my daily Janathon effort done and dusted as I wouldn’t be back home until after midnight. Went out and ran a few laps round the block, making a decent pace, but after just four laps and 2.4 miles I realised that, although I was running OK, I was thinking too much about other stuff, and I just couldn’t be bothered, so I stopped and went indoors to get ready to head back to Tolworth.

Met Helen in Lewisham, where we had a quick pint in the pub before heading off to the station to catch the train to Tolworth. A few shots of practice confirmed that my wrist was still OK to handbag it down the lanes even though I couldn’t throw as strong a shot as I would have like. So, I opened up with a 266 game, finishing with ten strikes in a row, and was pretty happy with that as the team nicked a very high scoring game by just a few pins. Next game 206, which was frustrating as we lost another high scoring game by just a few pins. And so on to the third game. Was all very close about halfway through when ….. the fire alarm went off. Cue five minutes of everyone standing around wondering whether to evacuate the building, understandably reluctant to do so because it was much warmer indoors. Eventually the fire brigade turned up, the girls all stole a quick look at the hunky firemen, the alarm was switched off and we all got on with the bowling. The team managed to cope with the interruption a lot better than the opposition and we managed to get something together and open up a gap and cruise to another huge game. Our team effort for the night set the season’s best score and I managed to hold it together for a 234 game for a three game total of 706, my first 700+ set in at least 3½ years. So I was very happy with that.

After a quick pint with the rest of the team, to celebrate our success, it was back on the train and off to Waterloo McDonald’s for a naughty Quarter Pounder, as there wasn’t much else still open at ten to midnight except Burger King. Helen then gave me a brand new bowling ball as a Christmas pressie because she is absolutely amazing!!!

Janathon running totals

• Time: 1:52:05
• Distance: 13.7 miles

And done with a few minutes to spare. I really feel like I’m winning at life at the moment!